|
While the song
distinguishes itself from the crowd because of its able and
elegant expression, the story it tells could be each of us at
one time or another. It relates the account of a young
person, hopelessly in love with another, and their final
realization that the person they’re involved with is never
going to love them back.
As the song begins, the depressed
person describes the internal conversation going on inside her
head. She has finally made up her mind. She intends for this
to be their last night together. She admits the truth to
herself now, at last. Even though her loved one says the
right words to keep her on the string, it’s clear he doesn’t
really feel any love behind them.
In her own
mind, she is begging him not to patronize her anymore. Don’t
lie to her anymore, giving her false hopes. Just lay down and
hold her this one last time, she silently pleads. And then at
last, “when morning comes”, she vows to herself, she’ll “give
up this fight”.
TOP
If you allow
yourself to empathize too much with the song, it actually
brings tears to your eyes when you hear her say of their last
encounter, “I’ll feel the power, but you won’t…no, you
won’t”. The power she refers to, of course, is the
overwhelming intensity of desire – or PASSION – that she is
feeling and which he does not.
The true highlight of the song – and the
hook, though, comes in the chorus when she sings:
“‘Cause I can’t make you love me if you don’t…You can’t
make your heart feel something it won’t…”
These words
reflect the utter despair of every failed relationship since
the world first began. They share the conclusions every
heart-broken soul has finally been driven to throughout
civilized history: that ultimately there is nothing a person
can do to make the One You Want love you. It either is or it
isn’t, but you can’t affect the outcome. We are all victims
of circumstance. At least, that’s what most people have
concluded.
But their
conclusion is wrong!
TOP
There Is Something You Can
Do
Though masses
of humanity have never discovered it, there is a secret
key to make the One You Want love you, after all. It is
somewhat hidden, but it exists. And as you will learn before
this article ends, the secret is that you make someone
love you not by external force, but by applying good
psychology (some say “reverse psychology”) in such a
way that the one you are trying to win becomes motivated from
within him or herself to want you – even to want you
desperately!
Aesop told a
story over twenty-five hundred years ago that is timeless in
its lesson to us about the power of indirect persuasion, as
opposed to coercive and manipulative force. It is the fable
of “the Wind and the Sun”.
In this tale
the Wind and the Sun were debating which of them was the
mightiest. Suddenly they saw a man walking down the road and
the Sun proclaimed, “I know how we can settle this. Whoever
can persuade the traveler to remove his coat first shall be
acknowledged as the most powerful. You may go first.”
TOP
The Sun then
took his place behind a cloud while the Wind set about to blow
as hard as it could upon the unsuspecting subject of their
test. But the more the Wind tried to get the man to remove
his coat by raising a huge noise and trying to actually blow
it off of him, the tighter the man held to the coat and
wrapped it around himself. At last, exhausted, the Wind
acknowledged the hopelessness of his efforts.
The Sun then
came out and, without so much as a whisper of his intentions,
simply shined upon the unsuspecting man, who soon found that
he had no need of his cloak any longer…and took it off!
Likewise, in
your efforts to persuade the One You Want to fall in love with
you, the less you appear to be trying to persuade him or her,
the better!
TOP
Believe it or
not, the one you want does need your help to raise
their sense of desperate desire for you. He or she is
powerless to do your job of winning him or herself over
for you. You have to take responsibility in this area.
In this sense,
Raitt’s song is accurate: the person you are pursuing “can’t
make their own heart feel something it won’t.” But there’s a
very good reason for this. As an equal partner with someone
for a lifetime, you have to bring something of value to the
table! You must be the one who holds the key to turn
on their interest, their desire, their passion, and to inspire
them! This is as it should be! You are, after all, applying
for the position as their “helpmate”.
But in trying
to win them, you must not act desperate in the attempt. You
must appear independent and just as happy to go on without
them, as with them.
TOP
Sometimes
people fall into a trap of blaming the One They Want for not
being a little more openhearted and for not giving them more
of a chance. The truth, however, is that in the final
analysis everyone has an equal chance to try and win someone’s
heart. If things aren’t working out, it isn’t the failure of
the One You Want. It’s simply your failure to turn them on,
emotionally! You’re failing the test, is all. The usual
reason people fail at this is simply because they don’t know
any better. At least that’s been my experience. But with a
little guidance, that can all change and you can
inspire your love object to great heights of passionate
interest if you wish!
NEXT PAGE
|
