Partly a history lesson and partly training in sociology
If we think of the postwar years, yes, I know, who thinks of post WWII anything these days, but just hear me out. With the crush of technology, modern obligations and distractions, being romantic is difficult enough. So why not think of a simpler time?
Yes, the Always On generation born right after the Millenials from 1999 to the present, wouldn't understand the desire to slow-down or look o relax without their notebooks, smart-phones, tablets, games or any number of other electronic diversions. However, the rest of us, even the Gen Y group, are getting overwhelmed with all of the things that we are expected to metabolize into our lives.
Many of us would recognize the absorption of classic 40's and 50's styles into gifts, clothes and even food. The nostalgia for a simpler time is driving our desire to connect to that time, when guys were guys and gals were gals. The typical comparison is that with the dawn of television and shows like Leave it to Beaver and My Three Sons, we had no choice but to perceive of this era as almost perfect. We often look back to see how far we've come in our culture, or not and in the United States there is a serious concern for the lack of etiquette, relationship sophistication, consideration and elegance in how couples treat each other. Divorce is threatening the institution of marriage. It's a true option and the children suffer for it, not to mention the former couple.
The rise of celebrity and even more repugnant reality television stars, have turned consumers to look even more toward that Golden Age of America. Instances of school shootings, terrorism, date rape, domestic violence, homophobia, alcoholism, drunk driving, teen pregnancy and many other societal problems still existed, but the portrayal of this time makes us think of it as a wholesome time in our country. We just came down from the euphoria of winning a devastating war and along with the television, we were just falling in love with cars as a society. It all seemed just right. The middle class was growing and people seemed to be enjoying life and all that it had to offer.
Poodle skirts and good girls were the norm with bad boys busy combing their Brylcreemed hair, too busy to get into fights or worse (here is the disconnect with reality). There was a general optimism and desire to grow your family with the pearl choker and heel wearing moms, baking cookies and taking care of the home and having all the modern conveniences they could buy, including refrigerators with freezers, small appliances and make-up. One reader summed it up from her own memories like this;
"We had the carefree fun of just growing up...
There were no drugs available on the streets...
No pregnant teens in the highschools...
No birth control available for girls...
No condoms in view, the Pharmacist dispensed them upon request...
No violent movies...
No violent video games...
No violence in schools...
No dirty magazines...
No cell phones...
We had Elvis...on TV they only showed him from the waist up. LOL
We had wholesome programs to watch like Lassie, Lone Ranger...American Band Stand
We had Princess phones
We had drive-in movies...and paid by the carload...
We had drive-in burger and shake hangouts...
We had ’sock-hops’ where we danced the night away.
We had music with words you could understand.
We had modesty and self respect.
We had virgins over 15, both male and female....
Payton Place was a book my mom hid under the cushion.
Banned in Boston...set the precident as to what movies were allowed to be shown in theaters.
My dads' first brand new car, a '56 Ford for $1000....
It was a time when being respected, healthy, wholesome and active were popular."
There is no question that this rendition is very subjective, but even the comic books from that era reflected this kind of civility, despite all of the repression (McCarthy), antisemitism and racism, socially strict norms that kept young mothers, drug addicts and other undesirables away from public view. There was plenty of ugly, but the sands of time have almost washed them away and we are now yearning for it practically and romantically.
When a peck on the cheek was enough romance
Bettie Paige was one of the less than pure brands from that era, yet it is one of the enduring symbols that show even porn from the 1950's was tasteful as opposed to the no holds barred free for all that is going on in our society today. Not that I object to it. I am actually all for sexual freedom, I just don't see the need to broadcast it, especially to our children who have all too often become victims to scams and worse online and off. Dating shows, tabloids and other media would have us believe that the old fashioned view that you shouldn't kiss on the first date is somewhat unexceptional or backward, when in fact that act, in and of itself, is respectful, considerate, measured and yup, you guessed it, romantic.
Other actions like pulling a chair out for a lady, taking off your jacket (hoodie or other modern over-coat), walking on the outside of the sidewalk, holding her arm in yours, offering to carry her bags, opening her car door (or any door) and any number of thoughtful gestures have been heave-hoed out the door as women's rights and how a man should behave movements have taken over. It's frankly quite a shame as all of these actions are part of romancing someone and partly because they are so uncommon today, I implore you to exercise your right to be nostalgic for these mannerisms.
Coming across multiple real world "Meems" (thought bubbles with humorous copy related to the selected image), we can see how even taking jabs at each gender is less hurtful and more playful than inter-gender sparring that takes place today. Many of the same relationship struggles that we have today, existed back then, but we didn't have the same options and ability to exercise them that we do today. Certainly, women as a large portion of the working class, higher education levels, greater income and an ability to control her own destiny has re-shaped much of the traditional role-models for wives and mothers and not just in divorce, but in romance and intimacy as well.
A man cannot simply come home from a day of work and drop his hat on the table, attache case on the floor, ask what's for supper, pull out his cigarettes and read the paper. That just doesn't happen while his doting wife kisses him hello on the cheek or gives him a big hug asking "how was your day honey". With instant messaging, texting, Skype and any manner of communication devices, we already know, yet we don't communicate any better than during the 50's and there is an argument that would say we actually communicate more poorly with all of these devices.
So now you can see why we believe that the 1950's era and anything linked to it, is in demand. Even diners styled in that way are big hits like Lucky's in Stamford Connecticut with it's turning stainless steel and red naugahyde stools. The candies were quaint and seemed to taste better. The electronics and appliances were brightly painted in pastel colors and didn't break so easily (at least we believe that now). The clothing was cute, fun and respectful (I know, I'm sounding like such a prude!) and a night out at the movies at a drive in was a big event.
Indeed, it was that anticipation and gratitude that was partly responsible for shyness and acceptance of simpler things. I didn't have to fly you off to Paris for supper and a drink to be romantic. The world was much smaller and the options so fewer. We didn't have the ability to scan the web for things to do, places to go or stuff to buy if we wanted to be romantic. We were truly hyper-local, which is one of the newest crazes for internet companies. It only took over 50 to 60 years to revisit this realism. Perhaps we were more naive as a society and less worldly. Maybe so, but if we look at the products and services with that same nostalgia, they carry the weight of generations of simple romance with them and are a sure bet to be appreciated today, just as they once were over a half-century ago.
