10 things a woman says and does that will help end a relationship
I loath watching the Housewives of any city with my wife or children. I cover my eyes listening to real people like Theresa from the New Jersey version, Honey Boo Boo (with her own show), the protestations of a clearly disturbed Bethany Frankel, the over-the-top antics of Dance Moms, Jersey Shore (thankfully cancelled, which gives some hope to humanity) and any of the other multitude of these copycat insults to humanity and our culture. One thing I can acknowledge, is that they provide clear examples of what to do if you want to scare men away or screw up a relationship, whether you are married, dating or looking.
If I considered the added pressure that these people are under trying to satisfy the producers of the shows, I might have some sympathy for them. However, when I hear that people like the Maloof's are getting separated, I'm not surprised in the least, having watched Adrienne's actions with her husband and her "friends". This is true for almost all of these characters and the way they proceed as if they have cornered the market in proper behavior is even more hypocritical and sad. Their husbands and boyfriends are not angels either, but when anyone considers the comments and actions of these women, most men would run, not walk away!
Beverly Hills Housewives have cornered the market on what not to do or say
Let's take Mrs. Maloof for example. When her husband asks her to hold his hand and she responds with "no, it's too hot", how is any person supposed to consider that rational or supportive of an intimate relationship. It seems that he Beverly Hills Housewives, with more money than many of the others, have more relationship problems. A glaring example is Lisa Vanderpump and her dog, with no intimacy at all between her husband and herself. Another clear example was reflected in the ugly break-up between Kelsey Grammer and his money and plastic surgery loving ex-wife (yes, he had plenty to do with the break-up, but Camille didn't help one bit after over a decade of marriage). It is all to heart-wrenching and crazy-making to watch and give more examples of, yet the relationship trauma that they go through seems to be entertaining for the vast majority of viewers who seem to take solace in the fact that these 1% members have the same if not more highlighted relationship problems than everyone else. Kind of a salve for the rest of us struggling to figure out how to improve, save or support our relationships.
So what is it that these reality celebrities seem to do and say that so damages their relationships? The following are just the top-10 pulled from their shows (with so many examples, it was hard to choose);
1) When there is no intimacy in a couples life for ... years. It feels more like a room-mate relationship than an emotionally supportive and mutually beneficial one. Very difficult to come back from that even if you love each other.
2) Constantly cutting off your husband, boyfriend or partner. A man can only take so much emasculation and then he will either cheat, bolt, get abusive or some other action that will directly damage or end the relationship. Most men don't have the intestinal fortitude to deal with the actual problems and unconsciously work to sabotage the marriage in irreparable ways, often causing more problems, but getting to the ultimate resolution in the end with plenty of anguish, heartache and pain.
3) In Medieval times, women would be punished fro speaking too much. It was thought that they were witches or demons. That is still true today when some of these women just don't know when to hold their tongues and then, are surprised that there are consequences for unbridled and unabashed verbal diarrhea.
4) Seeking drama seems to be an illness that most of these women have. Men hate drama. They loath it and will do anything to avoid it, including kill their relationships no matter how much money it costs. Our brains aren't set-up to deal with this!
5) Gossiping. There are certainly those women who are better at this than others, but it seems that they weren't taught to not speak badly about other people, or get into other peoples business when they were children. Is there any wonder that there is so much drama? Good for ratings, but bad for relationships.
6) Flaunting you success and rubbing your husbands face in it. It is one of the best things to have happened to women in North America and the worst. The ability to earn large sums of money. To build their own businesses and bank accounts, but like men, they sometimes don't know how to live with it. Men have fragile egos when it comes to some things. While it may not be money specifically, it does relate directly to his ability to earn a living and support his family. When a financially successful women can't help but revel in her cash like the comic strip Scrooge McDuck and constantly berate their husband, boyfriend or partner for not being as successful, kiss that relationship goodbye. Whether it is in a sugar mama situation of not.
7) Those voices! You can dress them up, but you can't take them out. Despite always seeming to have to outdo each other in dress, jewelery, cars, home furnishings, hired help (exercise trainers, dog whisperers, voice therapists, you name it) and so many other areas, if your wife, girlfriend or partner sounds like Fran Drescher (I love her, but that voice) or Maria Rosario Pilar Martinez Molina Baeza better known as Charo, you are out of luck!
8) See number 7 where the competition for more, better, expensive stuff get's so out of hand that it becomes an obsession. When will they stop? Usually not until they are bankrupt financially, morally and in every other way. Not unlike when children tease each other that "I have more than you-ou-ou do!"
9) Always being sick, or irritated, or too hot, or too cold, too fat, too skinny, not pretty enough. Comparing body parts and not measuring-up in breast size, waist size, or having too many premature wrinkles, eyelashes that aren't long enough, etc., etc. Nobody constantly wants to hear how something isn't right or is not acceptable or some other type of complaining. It comes almost naturally after awhile, and these shows point-out how the onset of excessive complaining can destroy any relationship, intimate or not.
Is Andy Cohen and Bravo profiting from deliberate destruction of peoples lives?