Romantic Cuisine

Your at home recipe for passion and intimacy on Valentine's Day and throughout the year

With Valentines Day fast approaching, I’m often asked what the ideal gift is. With today’s tough economy, the price of the gift is a consideration. Gone are the days of buying diamonds and expensive lingerie on a lark. Rather, more thoughtful gifts with depth and thought are now in vogue and frankly it’s about time.

One item that is often not discussed and is sure to be a hit with your spouse or girlfriend / boyfriend (and I might suggest that it’s the guy here that should take note) is getting his inner chef out for Valentine’s Day and any day

You don't need to wear an apron, just watch the splashing

throughout the year. Why? It’s simple. The preparation allows for a multi-faceted and multi- sensory experience. You can mess up any items, but because there are a number of steps to the experience, you will be forgiven (unless you cause your partner bodily harm or insult them personally!). Men's Health, Oprah, Askmen.com, match.com among many of the top male advice magazines and sites are high on men cooking a meal for their female companion, as they should be, but it is just as sexy for a woman to prepare and present an aphrodisiac experience at supper and what better time to do it than Valentine's Day?

What is Romantic Cuisine?

Romantic cuisine deals with a variety of aspects, such as sound, taste, texture, appearance, even touch (a lightly crisped , almond encrusted and delicate asparagus spear for example). In addition, the fact that you are preparing the

The senses are quick to pick-up what goes on in the kitchen

meal automatically gives you credibility along with the effort and creativity for the evening. Sure, it’s easy to simply go out for a meal, where you place your trust in the restaurant for the food quality (taste, presentation, aroma), ambiance / atmosphere and service. Here, you take the risks unless you are intimately familiar with the restaurant, especially on Valentine’s Day, when food establishments are notorious for developing ho hum menus with expensive prix-fixe, poor service and a synthetic kind of atmosphere.

My view is that it is easier to guarantee success if YOU are the one that is delivering these elements to your wife or husband. No matter how clumsy you are or how poor a cook you think you might be, with the vast array of information on the Internet, a quick planning and you’ll be a total success. There’s no need to be apprehensive or to question whether you can make the evening all that it promises to be. Expectations in most cases won’t be high, unless you‘re an excellent cook or chef, so you’ll be left off of the hook if something burns, or if you spill something or both. That’s why it is a win-win for you and your lover.

The elements of a romantic meal are straightforward. Music, a comfortable table, simply but cleanly set, lower light, a simple tasty menu, some yummy wine or drinks to take the edge off (go easy as you need your wits about you. You can get drunk later if you must) and your service skills and of course, the ingredients. That’s it in a nutshell.

Romantic Music

You should know something about your date, spouse or partner by now. If he likes Metallica or she grooves to

Find something you both find sensual and calming and the evening will be half won

Dub-step, you might look for an alternative that is equally acceptable to both of you, but won’t take away from the evening either. If you want it loud and disruptive because you’re afraid to have to speak to your partner, then you should reconsider the whole Valentine’s Day treat to begin with. Part of what is so successful with Romantic Cuisine is that you and your guest will actually look at and speak to each other. This is a very powerful aphrodisiac. Looking at their eyes, lips, skin, hair and really listening to what they are saying. To most people, that alone is stimulating and enticing. Slow it down a little bit and pay attention to the physical features of the person you really like or love. Let the music fill the background and support your view, not distract from it.

Music is a known mood supporter. There are experts who focus strictly on introducing certain tones and beats to people in order to cure them of various diseases or mental states. Don’t you think that a similar approach to your romantic Valentine’s Day meal would have a similar effect? Absolutely yes!

Romantic Atmosphere

While music choice is an element of atmosphere, it is powerful enough to stand on it’s own. Here, we are focusing on the setting for your romantic meal. Certainly, the fact that you have decided to present your partner with the meal in

Low light covers small imperfections and increases sexual tension

the first place is romantic, so you’re off to a great start! Choose comfortable chairs (unless you are comfortable sitting on cushions or the floor, which most North Americans are not) and a sturdy table. Candles are an absolute must for their flickering sedate lighting and preferably smell of an aphrodisiac (examples include vanilla, sandalwood, light ginger, ylang-ylang). I’m suggesting strongly that you include scent because we know scientifically, that scent and aroma also play a role in setting the mood. You wouldn’t be with your husband or wife if you didn’t like their smell, now would you? That is how powerful scent is to romantic cuisine and you should know which scents your guest doesn’t like. That would surely put a damper on the meal and evening.

Make sure that the table isn’t crowded either. Plates, cutlery, glasses, napkins (use fabric please) and serving utensils if you’ll need them. I won’t get into the design or type, it’s just enough that you are making the effort and it will be appreciated even if the fork is on the wrong side. Keep in mind that women tend to be colder than men when not active, so if you are a man serving, keep the thermostat at a warmer level and alternatively, if you are a woman serving, keep the temperature a couple of degrees cooler. You can always change the temperature, but the initial introduction is important and if they are cold or hot, you’ll get sidetracked.

Keep the lighting low, but not so low that you can’t see. Remember, you want to be looking in each others eyes and after I’m finished introducing you to a romantic Valentine’s meal that you will cook, most of the elements will come naturally to you. Candles on the table, scented candles placed about the room. You don’t want to have the table candles competing with the aphrodisiac scents of the food. Too much of anything is unpleasant.

Sophisticated and Elegant Service

You can be simple, but certainly play it up as best as you can if you’re someone with a sense of humor. A little self-deprecation is fine, but don’t go on about how horrible the food, music or otherwise is. Your partner will tell you if it is awful, but wouldn’t think twice about sitting on the floor with a dip and crackers if the whole meal is a disaster. That’s why atmosphere and a light drink are so important (if you or your guest don’t drink alcohol, then a non-alcoholic version would be perfect as well, just for the sensory experience of a smooth, liquid going down your throat like a mango lassi).

Perhaps a linen draped over your arm? Maybe large spoons for your salad and apron for laughs (I wouldn’t wear one, but if you are clumsy, go ahead, you can always take it off after you make fun of how you look in it). Ideally, the distance from the kitchen to where you are eating, won’t be the length of a football field. You should put as much on the table to begin with, like the salad, the wine and hors-d’oeuvres. A side table should also be accessible to put these items on when you are done with them, to allow room for the entrée, main course and dessert.

Ultimately, just be yourself in the end. Making the effort (in most cases), will disarm your partner and you will be forgiven most mistakes, unless things get way out of hand, like a major fire, hurtful comments, etc… Some 15% of non-cooks can’t get by even a simple service for whatever reason, just like the reality show “Worst Cooks in America” on the Food Network, but your partner would already know this unless it is a new date, which wouldn’t be a great idea if you are a total klutz.

The Romantic Meal

Millions of cook books have been written, with a dizzying number of recipes, how-to’s and pictures of culinary masterpieces, but there is no need to get concerned. The basics will make the evening a success. Don’t forget this is about romance and the sights, smells as well as tastes which are all important to the entire equation here. Unless you are skilled at cooking, you need not get too fancy. Often, simple meals that are well prepared can be very romantic. Especially when they are paired with soothing music (but not dreamy or sleepy. Luther Vandross or Harry Connick Jr. usually do the trick), a comfortable and aromatic (not stinky or smelly) atmosphere and your excellent and attentive service and conversation (think communication here people!).

The basics would include a simple hors-d’oeuvres like; soft Italian bread with a tasty olive oil, pepper and salt dipping sauce (that’s actually it, so simple isn’t it?), a Mediterranean spread like hummus (tahini and chick pea, lemon, salt, pepper and garlic, but go easy on the garlic please) and pita bread, julienne carrots, broccoli or other vegetable with a dill and cream cheese dip or go simple and present grapes and sliced cheeses. For an aphrodisiac twist, add fresh sliced basil to tomatoes and buffalo mozzarella. Basil being a very powerful mood adjusting herb.

Appetizer;

Again, let’s go simple since the meal should not be stomach heavy, difficult to eat (messy or sloppy like spaghetti) or overly spicy. You want to stay away from heavy garlic since the idea is a little intimacy after the meal, n‘est-ce pas? Shrimp cocktail with mild cocktail sauce is fun to eat with your fingers and very simple as well as tasty. For those that don’t like shrimp or don’t eat sea food, sliced avocado with tomato guacamole over diced Boston lettuce is soft to the palate and loaded with healthy omega 3 fatty acids (that supports certain functions!). Alternatively, small chicken or beef kebobs lightly steeped in either Greek oregano and dill or with light Thai peanut sauce would be a great starter. Not heavy, tasty and fun to eat off of the skewers. Do you see where I’m going with the playfulness of the meal? Nothing too formal yet delicious and fun to eat. I hear the giggling now, which is ideal for setting the mood to playful and happy.

Salad;

You’ll notice I didn’t include a salad as an appetizer as I am a firm believer in a more traditional or Southern European style of eating. The ingredients in a salad can include aphrodisiac herbs, which will serve to make the table aromatic throughout the meal and help with the mood. Salad also helps cleanse your palate as well as improve digestion which

Cucumber is an aphrodisiac for it's subtle scent

are all aspects of the meal that you needn’t worry about, but I do. A simple salad including walnuts which are high in minerals important to the circulatory system as well as libido. They should be broken into small pieces along with cranberries, or mandarin oranges in a bed of soft lettuces. Cucumbers are also an aphrodisiac because of their subtle smell and antioxidants. So cut them up in small pieces to make it easier to spear with your fork but not too large as to dominate the salad. Of course, tomatoes, olives and crumbled goats cheese can also be included. Make it up as you go with a strawberry vinaigrette, or similar. The aroma of strawberries are also an aphrodisiac that you should consider.

Do not go with heavy cheesy dressings or creamed anything. They have high fat content and can cause gas, which you don’t need when you are trying to romance someone. Serve the salad on small plates and offer the dressing in a separate decanter so your guest can decide how much he or she wants on the salad. Lot’s of moving parts are great because it shows how hard you’ve worked (when we know you haven’t really) and how much time you’ve taken to prepare. It also offers you extra opportunities to engage and interact with your guest by being attentive and in case you find it difficult to start conversation, you can talk about the ingredients, offer more drink, dressing, salad or other item on the menu.

Interlude;

Show your sophistication and elegance, even if you have little, by offering a small cup of lemon or lime sorbet to clear the palate. The vast majority of servers on any cooking show or restaurant don’t offer this most basic of treats and culinary “haute fortitude“. This will offer you another opportunity to show your culinary sophistication and help prepare your guest for more treats and unexpected pleasures for their mouths. You’ll find a great deal of satisfaction in the service and presentation as well, which will boost your confidence and guess what? Confidence is the sexiest aspect of any person. You’ll become more attractive to your partner as the evening wears on just by preparing and serving the meal. being capable is also very sexy. Add it up and you’re attractiveness is reaching new heights and you haven’t even gotten to the main course yet!

Main Course -Side;

I’ll reiterate what we’ve learned to date. Something simple, lightly seasoned, not difficult to eat, easy to digest and serve as well as easy to clean-up. We’ll go with one side, a vegetable such as asparagus (an aphrodisiac, but quite smelly in the aftermath), eggplant, spinach or kale. For spinach, a lightly salted and garlic seasoned (another purported aphrodisiac, but equally repellant for it’s strong sulphuric smell), pan fried in an open skillet. Spinach is very easy to prepare in this manner and if not overdone, is a nice visual accompaniment to any main course. Of course, broccoli, or cauliflower is also easily prepared in this manner as well as brightly colored red, orange or yellow peppers. French green beans (haricots vert) are also a nice choice for ease of preparation and taste after adding some water, oil and spices (herbs like oregano, dill and basil are good choices). While thyme, rosemary and tarragon are also aromatic, they are sharp and tend to get stuck in teeth, which is something we want to avoid, although pointing it out and gently bending over the table to pluck some greens out of your partners teeth is always an endearing, although slightly embarrassing gesture. Don’t bother with potatoes as they take too long are starchy and heavy. You could slice sweet potatoes and bake them in light oil and salt for about an hour and a half as they are also an aphrodisiac. Slightly sweet and heavy in estrogenic hormones, they, like many other vegetables and fruits work to support various systems in our bodies that need to perform at peak in order to satisfy post romantic meal activities.

For the Main Course; you can choose a lemon breast of chicken (no bones please. Remember, ease of eating), bacon wrapped filet (no more than 3-4 ounces, saving money and size. Remember, it should look sexy and taste divine while not being heavy), a small salmon filet of the same size as the filet, also drenched in light lemon, salt and pepper. Bake or broil them and you’re done. For the vegetarian, eggplant (unless they are allergic to night shade vegetables), avocado with quinoa slightly salted and peppered with oil will also do the trick. No legumes, unless you have ample Beano enzymes around! Don’t worry about filling up the plate. After all the courses, conversation and effort, you’ll be forgiven and we don’t want a heavy dining experience. Appearance is still key, so whether it looks like a Picasso or a Jackson Pollock, is irrelevant, so long as you made the effort on a clean plate.

Aphrodisiac Dessert;

Chocolate. If it isn’t a favorite of yours or your wife, husband, girlfriend or boyfriend, then you are in the very small minority. Go dark chocolate for the aphrodisiac effect. By this time, the conversation, food, service, music and aromas of the candles and aphrodisiac foods, should have opened both of your minds to more romantic thoughts. Feed each other the dark chocolate covered strawberries, molten chocolate lava cake, chocolate truffles or dark chocolate triple fudge cake wedges. Small portions please and you shouldn’t hesitate to feed each other these delectable little treats.

If chocolate isn’t your thing, go with a warm apple tart (not a pie, to big and it lacks elegance and why give it up at the end when you’ve been so successful to this point!). Make sure you add a little cinnamon and vanilla, to get those

Food can be a love potion if you know what to cook

aphrodisiac aromas circulating. You might offer some vanilla ice cream on the warm apple tart just to diffuse the scent. Something simple might also include coco or cinnamon poured on the foam of a cappuccino in the shape of a heart as demonstrated here. That would put quite a cap on the meal and assure more titillation leading to... well you get the picture by now. It's after-all the little things that add-up to build the intimate tension and that is a good deal of what this evening is about.

You’ll note that my focus throughout has been on the texture of the food on the palate, with the scent as well as it’s appearance. I like the idea of heat because it spreads the pleasant smells so much more quickly and tastes better. My objective from the start has been to provide you with an ideal Valentine’s Day meal that warms you up to a finally that you and your partner will be thrilled to repeat. Think romance, passion and intimacy which has been the theme of the entire evening. Ideally, you’ll have passed up dessert and revisit it later in the evening, after a digestif (I would suggest a light Italian dessert wine. Sweet and slightly bubbly like Coffele Le Sponde) or other liquid to keep you hydrated for the activities to come. Leave the dishes for the next day. You can always clean them up, but do definitely clear the table and serving table in case you can’t wait to taste the dessert on your partners lips. Oh, excuse me, I’m getting carried away just thinking about the evening with my special someone!

About the Writer
Lorne Caplan' started his career in biotech and medical device financing, moving into spas, skincare and all things anti-aging and romance related. This led him into his current focus on romance, passion and intimacy products and services. As a father and stepfather to five girls, his unique understanding of female physiology and mentality combined with his own personal experiences allows him to comment (with his wife's permission of course) on all things intimate, romantic and passionate. Lorne is a speaker and presenter and has appeared on television shows such as Dr. Phil and is frequently published and quoted in multiple media outlets like Shape, and Spa 20/20.

Loved this! I'll have to forward it to my husband and hope he gets the hint ;)