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The Sensuality
Series is specifically written to deal with difficulties
speaking about Sex and attaining Orgasm for women.
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Even if you're married, sometimes religious
teachings designed to discourage sex out of wedlock can get in
the way of your ability to enjoy the full banquet of marital
sexuality. Here's how to leave the guilt behind.
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This Month's
Q&A |
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Dear Dr. Joan-
Sometimes my partner wants me to do things during sex that I was
told were not proper when I was growing up. Yet I want to try
new things, but how do I get over my guilty feeling?
You Want to do
WHAT!
F (36) Atlanta |
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Guilt & Sex |
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Dear
You Want to do WHAT!:
Some women have been brought up with the myth that
"nice girls" don't have or don't talk about sex. Sometimes women have been made
to feel guilty for doing what is normal within a relationship. A woman may be concerned
that if she asks her partner to do something new during sex, he may think she is
criticizing him and his "manhood." What are the most common inhibitions, myths
and fallacies (IMFs)? I've listed several of them to the right. Did you recognize any of
those inhibitions, myths and fallacies?
TOP
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My sexual satisfaction had been quite limited until I
was 38 years old and started to use a vibrator, which has made a world of difference.
Before, if I had one orgasm a year, I considered myself lucky. Now, because of using a
vibrator, I experience wonderful pleasure and multiple orgasms. Some women think they
should only have an orgasm with a partner; otherwise, they are not "real women."
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One of my patients, Sandra, who only had orgasms when
she used a vibrator during lovemaking, asked me if she would ever have a "real
orgasm". I suggested that the pleasure and sexual release she was receiving was real
and normal. Where do your inhibitions, myths and fallacies come from? Your parents?
Your religious or moral training? Your peers, or possibly from a particular partner or
situation? Wherever they come from, isn't it time to let them go and enjoy the pleasure of
sex?
Enjoy!
Dr. Joan |
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TOP |
ACTION PLAN |
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How Many of These Myths Are Preventing You From Achieving Sexual
Satisfaction?
It is not right to talk about sex.
You should not discuss sex with your
partner.
If you enjoy sex, you are
"loose" or oversexed.
Words relating to sex are
"dirty" or "bad."
Men know everything about sex.
Fantasizing about sex, especially
with partners other than your own is sinful.
"Self-loving" is sinful or
bad.
If you masturbate, you are not
sexually satisfied or your partner is not satisfying
you.
Back to
Sexuality | TOP |
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Comments?
Tell Us What You Think!
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Sexuality Expert
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