Weekly Relationship Q&A:

"How do I get Him to Pop the Question?"

RELATIONSHIP QUESTION:

Dear Dr. Tina

My boyfriend and I have been together for over a year.  We're both in our mid 30s and I want to take it to the next level.  I want to get married.  How long should I wait for him to pop the question? 

I don't want to end up in my 40s and still single. I'd like to have children. How should I bring up this subject with him? I don't want to scare him off, but I don't want to waste my time.

Thanks,

Sophia, Butte, Montana

RELATIONSHIP ANSWER:

Hi, Sophia:

You are right that it's time to find out if he wants to be married and a parent now.  Have you talked about it at all?  If he's amenable, but just slow about asking, you may need to prime the pump. Don't worry about scaring him off. If you're serious about marrying and being a mom, you need to take the risk that you'll find out he's not really interested. Pick a quiet time together, and  say "Have you thought about taking our relationship to the next step?" 

If he hasn't, then tell him it's time to talk about it -- your biological clock is ticking and you need to know if he wants what you want.  The article '7 Questions to Ask Before you get Married' will give you a set of questions couples should discuss to find out if they're well matched and ready for marriage. 

Best of luck,

Dr. Tina

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Dr. Tina B Tessina (PhD, LMFT) covers relationship questions for Couples Company and is the author of over 20 books ranging from her multimillion selling 'The Unofficial Guide to Dating Again' and her latest 'Money, Sex, and Kids: Stop Fighting about the Three Things That Can Ruin Your Marriage ' and 'The Commuter Marriage'.

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