What a Woman Really Wants

By Tom McKnight

I promised you that we would follow up last year’s What A Man Really Wants with an article to balance the score. After all, we imagined as we wrote it, many women would wonder why we should consider it so important to cater to the almighty male, telling women how to make their man truly happy in his relationship with her, while ignoring the needs of the female.

The truth of the matter, though, is that while explaining what steps might be taken to help make a man’s satisfaction level greater in his relationship with a woman, the real purpose of the article was to empower her by so explaining his true and vulnerable needs. The purpose of this article today, is to empower the man.

In all these Tactics of Love, you may have noticed by now, the grand benefit of our strategy is that both parties always come out ahead, whenever the techniques are applied. Our philosophy is win/win. We know by experience that only that way provides lasting success.

You can win any person’s heart by simply doing the right things. But those “right things” ultimately are simply the basis to help the One You Want be as emotionally fulfilled and happy as possible. So, it is always in your own best interests, as well as the one you’re courting, to make their lasting happiness the focus of your long term strategy.

Adopting this strategy, we now confront both bad and good news in the world today. The bad news is that most women are dissatisfied with the dating and courtship arrangements they are stuck with for the most part. The good news, for you as a man, is that this means the world is your oyster just waiting to be plucked and enjoyed if you pay attention to what a woman really wants out of a dating relationship!

Dr. Drew Pinsky wrote in USA Weekend shortly after What A Man Really Wants appeared on this website that single women of college age across the nation are totally dissatisfied with the dating opportunities they find themselves presented with today. As they see it, he said, they only seem to find themselves with three different options: [1] “meaningless physical hookups” (sex with virtual strangers), [2] “friendship with benefits” (sex with acquaintances), and [3] “joined at the hip exclusive relationships that progress way too fast” (more sex, in other words, in exchange for the privilege of having somebody stick around long enough to feel like you’re beginning to know them).

You might think, with choices like these, it might drive a woman to drink! And you’d be right! Dr. Pinsky said, “Women told me they drank heavily just to tolerate the scene…”

What a Woman Really Wants

Women really want something other than these three choices. They want something…more. But in this case, more truly is…less! Now, men, pay attention!!

Dr. Pinsky revealed after extensive interviews with numerous women across the country that they are tired of being pawed at like a piece of raw meat. Indeed, their common fantasy was to have a man just be their friend. “When I asked what they wanted,” he related, “they said they just wanted guys to talk to them!”

Did you men of any intellectual capacity whatsoever out there catch that? Women want a man who will just be a true friend to them, without trying to obligate them to a sexual affair!! How difficult can this be? And yet, for the man who is willing to exercise some self restraint and respect women’s deepest desires in this regard, the field is wide open for him to choose and win just about any woman in this world he could ever hope to ask for!

Platonic Friendship is the Key

That is not to say that sex, at some point (like marriage), is not important to a woman. But the fact is men generally don’t have a clue how powerful their offering of a Platonic friendship is to winning a woman’s heart and making her feel like she is the Queen of the World.

I can’t tell you the numbers of letters I get from frustrated people, both men and women, who can’t for the life of them figure out how such a beautiful relationship with such unlimited potential went right down the drain, when the answer is sitting right there in their explanation to me in paragraph 2 of their letter: they jumped into a sexual relationship instead of making their love spiritually mature, based on seasoned friendship, and resulting in a solid covenant of marriage first. How hard can this be?!

Why do they jump the gun like that, time after time? Because “everybody else is doing it” and they think that’s the way a relationship is supposed to progress.

Well, I’m here to tell you backed up by Dr. Pinsky’s research that women really want something different than the three option norms currently being offered them. And, by being different, men, you have it in your power to not only make the woman of your choice one of the happiest and most fulfilled women on earth, but you have the chance to secure for yourself the gratitude and devotion of a woman who will never leave your side.

Dare to Be Different

Yes, what I am proposing is scary. After all, I’m suggesting that you consider being different. But the bottom line is: Do you really want the woman of your dreams, or do you just want to not seem weird? I’m betting that you prefer the former, but have just been falsely persuaded by the boys in the locker room that, unless you’re showing your masculinity by trying to seduce the One You Want, that she’ll think you’re not worth her time. But that is not true!!

Many men are afraid that a woman will be repulsed unless they try to “get something” because she’ll think they’re homosexual, or asexual altogether. But would you like to know a little secret?

I have received numerous letters over the years from women who are in dating relationships with bona fide homosexual men. And they are not repulsed! In fact, they are obsessed with such men! The pity is that, in most of those kinds of cases, the women’s yearnings mostly go on unfulfilled forever. Whereas in a legitimate case where a truly heterosexual man simply makes up his mind to build the relationship legitimately, saving the sex for the marriage where it belongs, her greatest joy is to ultimately bask in her man’s sexuality on their wedding night! And forever afterwards!

You see, there is a psychological law that defies being ignored, and it is this: “You want what you can’t have!” And when a woman senses that she has grown to be in love with a man who has become her best friend and begins to yearn for him sexually, it only intensifies her Passion towards him for her to have to wait!

I am obviously not suggesting toying with a woman’s Passionate Desires indefinitely. I am only pointing out that when men and women fall into casual sexual relationships before having tied the knot officially, one or the other usually begins vacillating in their deep feelings of attraction for the other. But True Passion is sustained in her by exercising self-restraint until the proper vows have been spoken and the time of waiting is fulfilled. Gratification actually kills Passion, whereas Abstinence fuels it!

By methodically building a love relationship built on friendship, and by both parties commanding and showing respect for each other’s rights for a real commitment that doesn’t waver with every passing whim, it is possible to sustain the infatuation longer and successfully propel them over the multiple obstacles that sabotage most relationships and right into the successful marriage both instinctively yearn for.

“Not waiting” is the real reason most people today are having difficulty finding and securing true lasting love – and I do mean most. So the decision is yours. Follow the crowd – and enjoy the serial failures at love that most of today’s men are experiencing; or, take a chance on what I am saying, and make your next relationship a lasting one.

Dare to Be Different

Dare to Stand Alone

Stand for Right and Decency

And Dare to Make it Known

Thanks

What a Woman Really Wants