When the One You Want Doesn’t Want You Back

(Here's how to change that!)

by Tom McKnight

Love, when it hits, can affect a person in funny, unexpected ways.

Before you’re smitten, you can feel so free and on top of the world. Things are going just great!! Even though you’re single, you’re popular with your friends. You’re happy. Life seems to be going your way. You feel like you don’t need anything…or anybody.

And then one day, boom, you get hit right in the face with an attraction for someone who you know would be the icing on your cake, if only they could feel that same way about you, too. Yes, if only…

But, invariably, they won’t. At least that’s what your experience in life has proven to you up until this point in time. Because as attractive as you have been throughout your life to the many who may have wanted you, you’ve learned that the minute you start wanting someone in particular, they won’t want you back!

It’s like some perverse law decreed in the Courts of the Universe, before the world began:

“People may only be romantically interested in you until you start liking them back.”

For some reason, it appears that you may have all the adoration and love you can stand, but it is destined to always be one-sided. The ones you don’t want adore you, but the ones you do want never want you back!! Every time you narrow your interests to one particular heartthrob, they will suddenly and without explanation lose any possible feelings of reciprocation for you.

What’s going on here, for heaven’s sake? Is it just some big cosmic joke?

The answer is…No.

What has actually been happening is a totally predictable phenomenon of human behavior, once you understand the psychological underpinnings of it. For this scene of human romance that has played itself out, over and over, countless times in the intense drama of the human race, is actually the product of simple psychological laws.

The bad news is that the pain has been so great for so many who have lived and died in the throes of rejection and self-doubt because of it.

The good news is that the phenomenon, once properly understood, is controllable and…reversible! That’s right. You understand me correctly. What I’m saying is that the despair known by rejected lovers since the world first began need not be your destiny! Knowledge of why people reject one another in romantic situations is key to empowering you to prevent it from ever sabotaging your hopes again. And over the next several minutes I’m going to outline for you in this brief article what exactly causes the rejection phenomenon so many have thought to be a puzzle without a solution, and hand you the keys to winning the one you want.

NEXT: Recipe for Love